A little book in C major
New York, 1916

New York, 1916

Happiness is peace after effort, the overcoming of difficulties, the feeling of security and well-being.
The lucky man is the one who is not even invited to the wedding.
Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later. For another thing, they die earlier.
The man a woman marries is usually her second choice. The woman a man marries is often not his choice at all.
Morality is the theory that every human act must be either right or wrong, and that 99 per cent, of them are wrong.
It is hard to believe that a man is tell ing the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place.
Every failure teaches a man something. For example, that he will probably fall again
A psychologist is one who sticks a pin into a baby and then makes a chart show ing the ebb and flow of the yell,
Conscience: the inner voice which warns us that someone may be looking.
Immortality: the condition of the dead man who doesn t believe that he is dead.
Remorse: regret that one waited too long to do it.
The chief knowledge that a man gets from reading books is the knowledge that very few of them are worth reading.
It is a sin to believe evil of others, but it is seldom a mistake.